God has been good to me. I have more in my life now that I ever dreamed I would have when I was young.
When I spent time dreaming of my knight, I didn’t know He was going surpass what I had dreamed. I didn’t know then that relationships morph and are far from static. What started out as a few thirst quenching drops changed into a nice pool with trickles and tickles. Then, for a while, a rocky dry river bed. Today, the pool I share with Ben is wider than ever. The words still waters run deep would certainly fit. But I want more.
Through this we have been blessed with a couple of boys, who are healthier and more beautiful that I could have ever imagined. I can’t really get enough of them. Some days it panics me to think I have to let them fly and morph into what God has for them. But I want more.
Our farm home is over hundred years old. It’s quirky and weird like me, housing everything from fits and fantasies to secrets. It gives me projects. I love it. But I want more.
From health to happiness to friends and family, I have more than I have ever dreamed. But I want more.
Why? Why do I want more? Why am I not content some days?
I think it’s because some days most days I look to myself for strength, instead of looking to Him.
In Psalms it says…”And I– in righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness.”
Will I? Or will I want God and…
And. There’s a fifty-cent word. It leaves me wondering… How much is enough?
I asked God to give me a great husband AND some great children AND a wonderful house AND…
He said, “I AM.”
I forget sometimes HE is everything.
And everything is enough.
Trying to remember to look up!
Sis
Tags: contentment, God is enough, how much is enough, I AM, I want it all, the pursuit of happiness
